A brief lesson from your favorite wisdom purveyor. Who may or may not have spilled an entire bottle of Honest Tea on her crotch this morning!!! (coworker: hey, dark jeans, no harm done! me: i smell like green tea. coworker: something tells me that’s not the worst thing you’ve ever smelled like. me: WHAT YOU DON’T KNOW ME!) I kid! It wasn’t an entire bottle. It was only 1/3 of a bottle. And it wasn’t all on my crotch. Some got on my thigh too!!!!!
Have you ever had a secret dream, internet? Not the dirty kind where you explore some of your confusing feelings toward your high school track coach or something less specific that doesn’t blow my cover just kidding coach!!!! But the kind where you truly want to BE something, and it kinda terrifies you? Because you know if you try it, you’ll try it truly, with your heart of hearts, and that opens you up to failure and shame and self hatred. Like even more than the usual amount.
I have those dreams. One such dream is to really try my hand at the baking world. You know, just really fucking BAKE for a living. Because it makes me happy to see other people happy at something that I’ve created, and that’s a seldom-experienced feeling in the marketing world. I mean, I really put my heart and soul into that communications document, but I’m pretty sure the project managers didn’t notice that all the font sizes are consistent.
And now I’m going to reveal how to make your dreams come true. Don’t shout out the answer, because it’s not any of the things you’re thinking. It’s not hard work, it’s not dedication, it’s not wisdom, it’s not bravery. It’s having a really ambitious friend that does most of the logistical legwork and kinda prods you into it and you don’t even really have time to stop and think about how scary it is and all of a sudden your business has a federal tax id # (which, if left up to you, certainly wouldn’t have happened).
SO, now you know: I’m starting a business! And by “I,” I mean, not really me at all. My friends Lenore and Anna and I are starting a business. We’re baking pies! Like, for money! Look, we even made a website: http://threebabesbakeshop.com. We’re really doing it! Because, why not? One day we’re going to die, you know? Like, I don’t know what the meaning of life is, but I want to try a bunch of stuff before my brain is being consumed by the flames of cremation. Ground burial is bad for the environment, y’all!
And because you’re such a loyal K in the K follower, you get to see it all unfold. The life-grabbing and the business-starting I mean. Because I’m going to be blogging the shit out of the process!!!!!!!!!!!!
Basically so many pies are coming your way, you don’t even know. STRAP IN, KIDS!