Wow I am not even kidding, readers. Don’t even MAKE these. You’ll watch yourself put in 2 whole sticks of butter and end up with like…2 dozen cookies. Most of which you’ll eat yourself, god damn it, despite telling yourself to STOP. STOP THIS. IT’S EASY. JUST DON’T PUT ANOTHER ONE IN YOUR MOUTH. but if i eat them now they won’t be around later to tempt me! THAT IS TERRIBLE LOGIC. WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO YOURSELF. ok maybe just half WHO LEAVES HALF A COOKIE aaaaggghhh.
And then you feel like the kind of girl who relates to those Cathy cartoons. And ACK! You did NOT sign up for THAT ONE.
So then you have to own your gluttony. All, no Ack. No crazed lines coming from my head. No frazzled diet diatribes (dietribes?). You are your OWN WOMAN and you EAT THOSE SNICKERDOODLES because you are slender and you work out and it’s your hot body and you DO WHAT YOU WAUNT.
Which, you know, brings up Cartman from South Park. And then your mind goes through one of those morphing animations wherein you go from your nice healthy frame to Cartman’s rotund shape in a small number of transitions. And what you don’t see in the off camera is the approximately 90 million snickerdoodles that made that transition possible.
But then there’s half a cookie sitting there and who are you to leave that kind of thing laying around?
Snickerdoodles for those with Insane Willpower
from Martha’s Cookies
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2 tsps baking powder
1/2 tsp coarse salt
1 cup (2 sticks) butter
1 1/2 cups plus 2 tbsps sugar
2 large eggs
2 tsps ground cinnamon
Preheat oven to 350. Sift together flour, baking powder, and salt into a bowl. Put butter and 1 1/2 cups sugar in the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment. Mix on medium speed until pale and fluffy, about 3 minutes. Mix in eggs. Reduce speed to low; gradually mix in the flour mixture.
Stir together the cinnamon and remaining 2 tbsps sugar in a small bowl. Shape dough into 20 1 3/4 inch balls; roll in cinnamon sugar. Space 3 inches apart of baking sheets lined with parchment paper.
Bake cookies, rotating sheets halfway through, until edges are golden, 12-15 minutes. Let cool on sheets on wire racks. Cookes can be stored between layers of parchment in airtight containers at room temperature for up to 3 days.