HI (ate us)!

FRIENDS, don’t run away. I’ve been busy. I know, I’m sorry, it seems like I say that a lot. But check it–this time I’m totally excused. I have a new job and a new apartment and I’m mid-move…so not a lot of baking has been happening.
Give mama a few days to collect herself and spread [...]

Oh, honey

Oh. Honey. This ice cream? Words are failing me today. There aren’t any words. Just:

Go. Go to the store. Buy some cream, and some milk, and a vanilla bean. If you don’t already have those things.

Then get some honey. Some really f’ing good honey. Maybe your dad is a beekeeper (holler at me offspring of [...]

On things coming up Milhouse

What does it mean, dear readers, when a black cat avoids YOUR path? Because that is what happened to me the other day as I was walking down the street, minding my own bidness. There are only a few ways to interpret this reaction from His Unluckiness. 1) My luck is so bad that if [...]

Preserving the Plum

I’ve been AWOL, I know. I’m totally sorry. Life is strange and wonderful, and sometimes it’s a calm sea and I’m sailing in an open boat and the breeze is blowing lightly through my hair and I can see the shore, and sometimes I’m upside down at the bottom of the ocean wondering if that [...]

Complicaked

There are things you should know about my friend Purd. We were friends in 1st grade, in Mrs. Purse’s class. We watched The Little Mermaid together in class (and I laughed out loud with the rest of the class when Scuttle twisted the fork in his hair and it poofed out, even though every time [...]

Ovocne knedliky

There is a long list of foods that are more appropriate for the Ultimate American Holiday than Czech fruit dumplings. But you know what? I’m not really in the mood for American fare. It’s too hot out to make a pie crust, I have no interest in many layered and many colored jellos, and…what else [...]